Last week, Mac Miller was pronounced dead via overdose. Immediately people started looking on where to place blame. The first target: Ariana Grande. If you don't know, Ariana was Mac Miller's ex-girlfriend. They dated for two years and ultimately the relationship ended over his drug use and the behavior that came with it. So I found it disturbing that anyone would blame Ariana for his death. This comes months after he crashed his car and was charged with a DUI. People immediately blamed her for that as well because she had broken up with him just before. Ariana responded directly by saying the following:
“I am not a babysitter or a mother and no woman should feel that they need to be. I have cared for him and tried to support his sobriety & prayed for his balance for years (and always will of course) but shaming / blaming women for a man’s inability to keep his s— together is a very major problem.”
I could not agree more with her statement. A relationship to me is the meeting and conjoining of two souls. Two souls that are on the same path in life. It means that we are each a whole, healthy person and that together we make each other even better. It was clear that Mac Miller & Ariana Grande were heading in two completely different directions.
Exactly how long must one tolerate another because they love them? How many chances does one person get to change their bad habits? I understand that drug use is a serious matter and it controls every aspect of a persons life. Still, I am tired of people expecting you to stay in a relationship with someone who is dragging you down every day. I have no doubt that Mac Miller was an awesome son, friend, etc. but his drug use took priority over his relationship (not to mention is own well-being) and ultimately, he made the decision where the relationship was headed. This is often where the biggest conflict is in leaving a relationship like this.. you see the amazing person someone is when they are sober and being their best selves, but the intoxicated version of them over powers any good they have. I believe this is why it's so hard to leave someone with an addiction.. it's the potential you see, not the actual broken person in front of you.
In the end, it is simply no ones place to get you out of your hole. Whether it's drugs, alcohol, cheating, gambling, whatever it is.. at the end of the day, you are responsible for yourself and no one has to tolerate your behavior. I've been in two relationships where the person had an addiction and let me tell you, that came at a cost to me and lots of other people in their lives. People who haven't been in that type of relationship have no idea what it's like. If you love yourself and value your future and your time, you won't tolerate it for very long.
It was said that Millers friends and family knew not to bring up Grande because it was still a touchy subject for him and that he probably overdosed because he will still heartbroken. Honestly, that is a very sad and horrible situation. I hate that he didn't value himself enough to get help, but this is not Grande's fault. She did her part and he simply failed to step up and better himself and the situation. It's one of those situation that we have to look at objectively without getting overly emotional because it is what it is. He had all the money in the world to get the help he needed and he chose not to. So maybe in the end, this was always going to be the outcome whether she was there or not.
My concern with stories like this are the teenage girls watching it. Lets teach them that it is okay to leave toxic relationships and that just because you do doesn't make you a "bitch" or unloving/uncaring. It is always okay to love someone with your whole heart, even through all of their flaws (since we all have them!). Sometimes though, the flaws are dangerous.. you have to love them from afar and ALWAYS love yourself just a little bit more.. that's how you will keep the toxicity out of your life and make sure that you are surrounded by healthy relationships.
IT'S ME by Jacqueline Grieve
Hey, you guys, don't feel guilty,
It was just my time to go.
I can see you're all feeling sad,
I can see the tears still flow.
My life's journey ended early,
The path I chose was short.
You all tried your best to change it,
But in the end it was for me to sort.
I know I caused you sadness,
I know I caused you pain,
But I was captured by these demons,
They wouldn't set me free again.
They took away my freedom,
They took away my choice,
And when they got their hooks in,
You could hear it in my voice.
There were times I tried to fight them,
There was a time I nearly won,
But they came back and overpowered me,
I had nowhere left to run.
I haven't really left you guys,
I am closer than you know,
I will be the whisper in the wind,
I will be everywhere you go.
One day you will all forgive me
One day you will understand
And when your time on earth is done
I will be waiting to take your hand.
Source: https://www.
It was just my time to go.
I can see you're all feeling sad,
I can see the tears still flow.
My life's journey ended early,
The path I chose was short.
You all tried your best to change it,
But in the end it was for me to sort.
I know I caused you sadness,
I know I caused you pain,
But I was captured by these demons,
They wouldn't set me free again.
They took away my freedom,
They took away my choice,
And when they got their hooks in,
You could hear it in my voice.
There were times I tried to fight them,
There was a time I nearly won,
But they came back and overpowered me,
I had nowhere left to run.
I haven't really left you guys,
I am closer than you know,
I will be the whisper in the wind,
I will be everywhere you go.
One day you will all forgive me
One day you will understand
And when your time on earth is done
I will be waiting to take your hand.
Source: https://www.
Rest Easy Mac ❤
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